Saint Wannabe
For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Romans 7:19-20 Since I was a little girl, I aspired to holiness like my brother aspired to be a professional football player. Religion seemed so simple: follow the rules, life goes great, you go to heaven. And, I was great at following the rules! It just came naturally to me, kind of like a talent. But there are by-products to a character fastened to rigidity: a prideful heart filled with…
The Great Net Drop
At once they left their nets and followed him. Matthew 4:20 We all want to act like we’re not. We rouge and powder ego, cover seeping wounds with designer labels, stuff our homes full of temporality. We watch our sparkly watches tick, tick time, forgetting life paces us in our stand still. Every moment, every pulse, meant to frolic and savor and wring out, pours from our pitcher of carelessness. Our bodies wither as we shake hands, skin wrinkles paper thin, organs slow blink by blink. No, this isn’t what you say in a Friday “give me something to go on, Taylor” blog. But it is the truth: this life,…
Humble Pie
Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 1 Peter 5:6 I think we forget something about humility. It’s–I know!–one of the gag words. No one wants a piece of humble pie served up so big and unavoidable and public (why does that always seem to be the case with me?) that there is no choice but to gulp it down as fast as possible. I think we forget that it’s not a bad thing. Mother Theresa said it best: “Humility is the mother of all virtues; purity, charity and obedience. It is in being humble that our love becomes real, devoted…
The “S” Word
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30 The time out chair sits in our front room: an old and tacked-leather wingback from one of the Nordstrom shoe departments my husband’s father managed years ago. Strong and water proof (very important during the potty training years), it won’t buckle or tip because a screaming toddle decides to jump up and down on it in defiance.…
The J Monster
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24 I am always surprised when the J monster slithers under the back door of my heart. One moment I am enjoying a friendship, and the next my heart tightens and races as if it has been poisoned. I feel the beast climbing up my throat, threatening to choke out our conversation. I shake my head, trying to shake loose of its grip. I leave the moment in a fog, asking myself, Where did that come from? But once…
